Delays and

First of all, sorryyy for not writing anything in ages. what can I say, inspiration's a bastard. just comes and goes as it pleases. anyway, I don't really do the whole 'writing the longest blog'-race. like to keep it fairly short and fairly reasonable. I don't really have the need of the twenty year old Dylan Moran to show off. it gets somewhat boring, so I try to say only what I need to say and not tell you what you need to hear. still, I'm gonna write a few paragraphs on lies and lying to ourselves.

I bet you found yourself lying when you were alone. I lied about feeling good being on my own for so long that I actually started believing I was better off with just me. I wasn't in love. I basically had one friend (at least one bloody good one). and I was afraid of doing anything about it. also I feared that if I stayed the way I was, I would never get to go back.

second, I found myself lying when I fell in love. I found myself lying when the friends quadrupled and someone really cared. again you were afraid. I feared that if I was just me, they would all just go away and I'd be alone again. which didn't happen by the way.

these irrational thoughts. our lies. our guilt, pain and fear, represent life. never have fear or never take a chance, and you'll probably end up not finding what you want and need. people will come back, people will be the centre of your attention always. it's just that the people change and that's when fear enters the stage. I think maybe one key is to not fear to be afraid.